Nice Guys Finish Last

Everyone’s heard the saying “nice guys finish last.” Sadly, I’ve found this statement to be mostly true.

I used to be the “nice girl.” I was always polite. I always shared with others and helped out when needed. I would be the one tutoring the jock and befriending the new kid. I was always the one alone, left out, and made fun of in the end. I finally reached my breaking point sometime in high school. I can’t pinpoint the exact time, but one of the major turning points was when my so-called ‘best friend’ began calling my cousin a whore to anyone who would listen because my cousin had just broken up with her cousin.

School yard dramas never amused me, especially when family became involved. When I told her to stop, I asked politely of course, she called off our friendship (she had been the new girl the year before and didn’t need me anymore) and started another rumor of my other cousin doing drugs or some other illicit substance.

I was realizing that people were nothing but cruel and only used you until you weren’t useful anymore. So, I began changing. As cold as it sounds, I don’t think I trust anyone completely. I trust, yes, but no one knows everything. I am a liar as I’ve explained before, and portray the facade I need to portray to certain people. Of course, I try to be honest, so I stay as close to the truth as I can, but that’s the best I can do.

Would you like another example of a “nice guy” finishing last? I have a friend, whom I’ll refer to as N (like how I pick anonymous names?), whose father was a twin and the youngest of five children. N’s father, as the youngest, was always picked on. It didn’t help that his twin often made enemies with others and he would be mistaken for him. It didn’t change as he aged.

N’s father was brought up in a strictly Catholic household where the Bible, the priest, and his parent’s words are law. So he never complained when he was overlooked or when his siblings went over his head to get what they wanted. When it was his turn to get a car, he got a job, got his license, and followed all the rules his parents gave to him. What should happen?

He didn’t get the car. His twin, who was a slacker and failed the driving test previously, or so I’m told, asked for the car and got it. It has continued that way as the years go on. His brothers and sisters want to go to the amusement park, his father will take them, but they conveniently forget to invite N’s family. Whenever one of the siblings throws a party, N’s grandfather contributes. The twin even got the down payment for his house from N’s grandfather.  I honestly am disgusted with how horrible they treat the peacemaker and only credit to their family.

Would you like to hear more tales? This one is shorter, a school yard drama, so forgive my natural disdain. My friend shall be referred to as M. M had been dating another friend of mine, S, for about five years. At about five years, my friend S dumped him. Naturally, I stayed out of it, but I watched. From what I could tell, S had no reason to break up with M. M had been nothing but the attentive, loving, compassionate, and nearly perfect boyfriend for S. I heard another friend of mine verbalize my thoughts to S.

Her answer almost made me laugh. “He’s a nice guy, but I don’t have time for distractions anymore.” Wow… Dating a nice guy no longer is good thing apparently. It’s considered a distraction. I always thought a nice guy would help with work, not distract from it, regardless of your relationship with him. Anyways, M is still pining for her, he’s a lot more discreet about it now though.

So tell me… Do you believe “nice guys” finish last?